Canada must freeze and starve the treacherous Yankee.
They have betrayed us, and proven they can never be trusted again.
America has betrayed her closest friends. On February 1st, the United States threatens to impose economic warfare on Canada and México, with the explicit intention of forcibly annexing our countries into American Empire.
Friendship was not enough for the Americans, because the United States is incapable of friendship. The soul of the Yankee Empire is consumed by the desire to dominate, and now their imperialist ambitions have turned towards our home.
There are many who believe that it is hopeless to defy the Americans, and there are a treacherous few such as Kevin O’Leary and Danielle Smith, who seek to weaken Canadian defence and collaborate with Donald Trump’s fascist regime.
All of them are fools. Nations far less powerful than Canada have defied the full strength of American Empire before, and terrified the Yankee into submission. Canada is more than capable of fighting for our freedom, but we must stow our fear, and face the Yankee with courage.
There are no diplomatic solutions to this crisis, because this is not an issue that can be compromised on. And while Donald Trump triggered this annexation threat, it is not merely his fascist GOP lackeys that support Manifest Destiny.
Indeed, American Democrats have provided tacit support for these threats, including Governor Jared Polis of Colorado, who now supports the annexation of Greenland.
This is an important lesson for every Canadian seeking allies in our fight for freedom. Whether an American politician is a Democrat or a Republican, one thing will always be true: they are a Yankee, and they cannot be trusted.
So, what can Canada do to defend our freedom? More than the Americans could ever dream of, in their worst nightmares. We can freeze them, we can starve them, and we can plunge them into darkness.
Let me explain Canada’s full potential to devastate Yankee civilization:
No More Oil
In the year 2023, the United States imported over eight and a half million barrels of petroleum, every single day. Crude oil imports, such as the imports from Alberta’s Oil Sands, make up 76% of that total daily import.
And wouldn’t you know it, 52% of those barrels come directly from Canada. Over half of the petroleum which the United States imports every single day, is purchased from Canadian companies.
Well, that ends immediately. There’s no point waiting for Donald Trump to fire the first shot against us on February 1st; we should hit the Yankees harder than they’ve ever been hit before.
Americans have clearly forgotten their own history; after the 1973 Yom Kippur War, Arab countries began an oil embargo on every country which provided support to Israel. The result?
Oil prices quadrupled on the world market, from US$3 per barrel to US$12 per barrel. And then, in 1979 after the Iranian Revolution, it happened again; to make an example of the United States, and get revenge for American policies, enemies of America have successfully used their control over oil to devastate the Yankee.
America’s reliance on foreign oil has crippled them, time and time again. If Canada withheld the crude oil we export to America, more than half the American supply, we could shutter their factories, we could collapse transportation, and worst of all?
We could make them freeze over the winter. When you get your oil from other countries, heating your winter homes is your weakness. And Yankees are much more threatened by cold temperatures than the Canadian people, who have adopted the winter as our own.
Finally, let us give full credit to México, who is responsible for another 11% of Yankee petroleum imports, on top of Canada’s 52%. With a little team effort, an alliance between Canada and México will make the pain of the Yankee even more unbearable.
But why just freeze the Yankee, when we can starve them too?
No More Food
Potash, for city slickers who are unaware, is a group of mined and manufactured salts which contains potassium; this potassium makes potash extremely valuable as a crop fertilizer, and the Yankee is even more reliant upon Canadian potash than they are upon Canadian oil.
There are two main forms of potash sold as fertilizer for agricultural use: Potassium Sulphate, known as SOP, and Potassium Chloride, known as MOP.
MOP is naturally occurring, but the chloride limits which crops it can be used on; SOP is a premium product which is better for many crops, but it does not naturally occur, and the process to create it is so resource-intensive that SOP is typically priced at double-to-triple that of MOP.
A third fertilizer in this category also exists, Potassium Nitrate (NOP). It competes in the same premium market segment as SOP, and the nitrates provide benefits in niche applications. However, the main focus of the potash market is on MOP and SOP.
Despite the benefits that NOP and SOP provide for our crops, MOP is still an extremely important resource to any sovereign nation, beyond just the cheaper price:
It can be used to save SOP and NOP for crops which would be hurt by chloride
It is useful for crops and soil which benefit from chloride
It can be used as a precursor to create SOP and NOP
How much MOP does Canada supply to Yankee farmers? It turns out that America imports eighty-five percent of their annual MOP from Canadian sources.
The potential to retaliate against American threats to Canadian sovereignty is quite clear. We can unilaterally sever all supply of potash to the United States, and the American agricultural industry would collapse overnight.
To call it a famine would be an understatement. This would not merely cause the prices of groceries to increase; it would cause food to disappear entirely. The damage that this would do to the fabric of American society is incalculable. It would be one of the greatest tragedies in the history of human civilization.
And yet, Canada could still do worse than freeze and starve the Yankee. We could plunge America into complete and utter darkness.
No More Power
As Fatima Syed wrote yesterday for The Narwhal, Canada and the United States have shared electricity for more than a century. And in her article, she maps out exactly how severe of a weakness this is for the Yankee.
Every single border province has linked their power grid to at least one American state. And if Canada were not exporting far more than we import, this would terrify me. But instead, this is one of our greatest weapons to defend our independence.
Both Ontario and Québec produce such an excess of electricity that we choose to sell it at discount rates to our American “friends”, rather than allow it to be wasted. How generous of us!
Indeed, American states have become dangerously reliant upon Canadian electricity. And we don’t need to speculate on the dangers when that power goes out. It already happened in 2003, and it was terrifying.
The Northeast Blackout of 2003 affected forty-five million Americans across eight states. These states included Massachusetts, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, New York, Connecticut, and Vermont.
What was the result? Trains were completely unable to run between Philadelphia and Boston, planes were grounded as airports lost all capacity to screen passengers and scan their tickets, and the pumps at gas stations ceased to function.
Cellular telephone service collapsed, and landlines were overwhelmed by traffic volumes. Cable television and the Internet both collapsed in the region, and tens of millions of Americans were unable to obtain any news on their situation.
Perhaps the damage was most severe in New York City. The entire NYC Subway and commuter rail network shut down, with hundreds of cars trapped between stations. Those who used transit to commute into the city, unable to return home, were forced to sleep on the streets.
Nearly one hundred people died as a result of the Northeast Blackout of 2003. And now, as a result of Yankee threats to annex our country by force, Doug Ford threatens to intentionally trigger a second blackout of equal magnitude.
It appears that Karl Marx’s quote about the repetition of history is proven true:
The first time is tragedy, and the second time is comedy.
The Yankee Should Fear Us
These are the three economic weapons that Canada has at our disposal, to defend ourselves from America’s threats to steal our freedom. These weapons of economic mass destruction are truly horrifying, in the havoc and devastation that they would unleash upon the continent.
But fascists like Donald Trump only speak the language of force, and we must demonstrate willingness to defend ourselves against his oppressive force, with an even greater force of our own.
Every day, despite the criticisms I launch at my government, I am proud to be a Canadian. I am proud to live freely, and to never fear the American Empire, no matter how apish they beat their chests.
The Yankee believes that our kindness is weakness, and we must disabuse them of that notion. They have turned back from our friendship, they have betrayed our alliance, and they can no longer be trusted.
Enough is enough. We must break America’s delusions of conquest. We must defend our freedom from those who wish to steal it.
We must freeze, and starve, the Yankee.
As an American, I don't think its a bad idea for Canada to retaliate in some form (especially industrially) but are the tariffs the same as cutting power with the intention of literally killing people? Genuine ask as a non-canadian, are the Tariffs that dangerous to the people of Canada? I enjoyed the article, but I'm seeking a little more perspective. Thank You.
I have to greatly disagree with the tone and premise of this article. I don’t think you can beat empire and fascism by waging a nationalistic war with the US. I understand there are serious merits to leveraging our power in resources and the grid to move American policy makers but it has to be pointed towards some specific end. Otherising Americans into this “Yankee” dissolves the power dynamic between politicians and citizens. The language in this post also speaks on freezing and starving US citizens which in the context of a war, trade or otherwise, does not seem any different to the war crimes we decry in other conflicts. We don’t attack civilians because we understand that they are not responsible for the actions of their government. If we did believe this we would be ideologically aligned with Osama Bin Laden.
Another point of contention I have is with the argument about oil. You state that the oil embargo caused global prices to rise. Do you mean to say that if Canada leveraged some kind of embargo on the US the price of oil would rise as well? Because I believe it will which will also deeply hurt Canadians. Seems like a pyrrhic victory to me.
Finally the whole idea of borders and national identity seems utterly fruitless and harmful to any political project. The obsession with borders only serve empire and restrict the movement of labour. If we are being honest, and Trudeau himself has said as much, what defines us as Canadians is that we arnt American. In a sense he’s right and I still don’t care. I want to be a citizen of humanity with equal representation for everyone.
I appreciate your work in voicing your thoughts but I must disagree with it in its entirety.